icehogs

Panic!

Well, if this were really what we wanted to talk about, I guess we should lose our shit over Rockford’s 6-1 exhibition loss opener to the hated Chicago Wolves. Right, let’s try.

ALEC RICHARDS IS TERRIBLE! OUR HOPES OF GOALTENDING IN THE ORGANIZATION ARE IN THE TOILET! WE HAVE TO GET RAY EMERY STARTS AHEAD OF HIM!

NICK LEDDY DIDN’T HAVE SIX ASSISTS! HIS DEVELOPMENT IS NEVER GOING TO MOVE FORWARD!

CLENDENNING? MORE LIKE CLEN-SUCKING! (did he even play?)

DAT KARL BEACH, HE ONLY SCORED DA ONE GOAL AND DIDN’T EVEN BREAK ANYONE’S FIBULA! WHERE’S DA TOUGHNESS DAT DA HAWS ARE GONNA NEED WHENEVER THEIR RICH PAMPERED ASSES DEIGN TO PLAY HOCKEY AGAIN? (would this meatball character use the word “deign”? I’m guessing he probably wouldn’t)

WHY ARE DEY PLAYIN’ IN ROLLIN’ MEADOWS AND NOT BACK AH DA YARDS?! (Does Back of The Yards have a rink? That would be pretty ace I think. Maybe. Maybe not.)

Ok, well I tried. Anyway, if you can’t make any sense of that – and why would you be able to — the Icehogs started a three-game preseason last night against the Wolves and got spanked. Alec Richards, one of the four goalies the Piggies have in camp, was Adam Dunn-like in net (now that the season is over Sox fans will stop yelling at me for no reason, right? Even McClure doesn’t yell at me and he LOVES yelling at me). They play Milwaukee tonight in Rock Vegas and it’s completely free if you want to go. That’s right, free. The only price you’ll pay is the drive to Rockford, which admittedly is a lot (unless of course you’re driving there in 1988 to see Guns N’ Roses in a movie theater of about 300 people as my brother did in high school, which I will never, ever forgive him for even though I was like six and wasn’t quite ready for a GNR Live show. Just barely).

Anyway, we’ll check in with the Frozen Swine again before they officially kick off next Saturday at Rose Mizon (if you think I’m going to call that place what it actually is named now you’re very much mistaken).

 

  • http://twitter.com/VULTR3 Mike

    Haha, man that cracked me up. You’re right too, it’s really hard for me to care about the Ice Hogs’ sucking.

  • OMFS88

    Ice Hogs? More like Ice SLOGS…. ohhhhhhh

  • Lobster

    I know you are joking, but was alec richards a guy anyone had high hopes for anyway? He is not a young guy (not sure what his exact age is) and he hasn’t had a single “good” pro year.

    As far as goaltending goes I am looking right at simpson and carruth, and possibly this whitney kid. I know he was a 7th round pick in part because of attitude issues (supposedly), but I like his build and think he could develop into something.

    • 2883

      Whitney was rated pretty highly by the CSS (2nd best NA Goalie behind Subban). For a guy in the 7th round, seemed like a real good flier.

      • Lobster

        Yup, though apparently he had attitude issues.

  • TMFF

    NHL cancels first two weeks of season totaling an entire season worth of games for one team (That would be 82 for those of you in DeToilet or Scum City Jr.).

    The NHL and IMHFO mainly the NHLPA have no idea how bad they are fucking themselves right now. With every game cancelled more fans are turned off equaling less revenue to the league. I do not think for a second the League will get the same level of forgiveness or anything close to it this time around as they did last time.

    Fool me once shame on you, Fool me twice you can go get fucked!

    • OMFS88

      Agreed. The fans who are pumping money into this thing these days were all around in 2004. WE DID NOT FORGET.

      … I’ll be back though because I am a sucker for rejection.

      • Lobster

        They’re just playing hard to get, right…

  • ahnfire

    Did Leddy play? I didn’t see his name on the roster that Kuc tweeted…

    • Accipiter

      No. I believe his 1st pre-season game is tonight.

  • adelfiacco10

    I like that the all-caps panicking eventually regressed into meatball-ese, what with all the DAT’s and DA’s. Nice touch.

  • putmeinthemadhouse

    I don’t believe leddy was playing in that game